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Hey homophobes: KISS THIS!

If you haven't been following LGBT news lately (and if you haven't, you probably don't read this blog, because that's basically all that we do, so I don't know who the hell I'm even talking to then), there has been a lot of hubub around kissing lately. That's right. Kissing. That radical, guerrilla act of touching your lips to someone's cheeks for about half a second is usurping the social norm around the nation.

First up, on Thursday, June 9, Matt Aune and Derek Jones were arrested for trespassing on the sidewalk near the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints Temple in Salt Lake City, after the partners kissed on another on the cheek on their way home. According to the Mormon church, that peck on the cheek constituted radically inappropriate behavior. But--as much as the church probably wishes--you can't arrest someone for being gay in Salt Lake, so they had them arrested for trespassing instead. So this weekend must've been a hell of a time for the cardiologists who monitor the blood pressure of the leaders of the Mormon temple, as 100 people of every creed and sexuality came down to Main Street in the shadow of the Cathedral, and smooched. Surprisingly, the National Guard nor SWAT never showed up to break up this dangerous militia.

Just a week, however, a kiss brought Texas back into the gay news again... as if they ever left.

Just a day after the Rainbow Lounge sweep that turned into the worst police-gay interaction since the Stonewall Riots, and just days before the Dallas Eagle was raided by the same TABC that botched the Fort Worth sweep and left one man in the hospital; the El Paso police had to begin explaining why they arrested a gay couple for kissing on the cheek at Chico's Tacos threatening to cite them with "homosexual conduct." According to the El Paso Times, this is how these usurpers operated:

At about 12:30 a.m. on the morning of June 29, the five men were placing their order at the Chico's Tacos on Montwood when the two men made their public display of affection, sparking the ire of two contracted security guards at the restaurant, police and witnesses said. After the group sat down, the security guards told them "they didn't allow that faggot stuff to go on there," and made them leave, de Leon said. An officer arrived at the restaurant about an hour later, after police received five calls, including from the security guards and de Leon. The men were told to leave the restaurant and had anti-gay slurs directed at them while they waited for the police.

"I went up to the police officer to tell him what was going on and he didn't want to hear my side," de Leon said. "He wanted to hear the security guard's side first." The officer informed the group it was illegal for two men or two women to kiss in public, de Leon said. The five were told they could be cited for homosexual conduct - a charge the U.S. Supreme Court ruled unconstitutional in 2003 in Lawrence v. Texas. That same year, the city of El Paso passed an ordinance banning discrimination based on sexual orientation by employees of the city and by businesses open to the public. El Paso Police Detective Carlos Carrillo said a more appropriate charge would probably be criminal trespass. "The security guard received a complaint from some of the customers there," Carrillo said. "Every business has the right to refuse service. They have the right to refuse service to whoever they don't want there. That's their prerogative."

As if gays needed another reason to not visit Texas. Not surprisingly, Friday June 10 these kissing maniacs pulled a "Salt Lake" and staged yet another big kiss-in demonstration to the horror of good plain folk who never ever kiss after their wedding day and don't even know HOW to deviate from the missionary position--NOT that they want to!

This is not the first kiss-related arrest in Texas this year. Back in February a lesbian couple was arrested for "making out" in San Antonio. Its looking like Everything really IS bigger in Texas--including the irrational homophobia. Everything is bigger in Texas, it seems, because all of the small minds leave so much space!

All of this kissing/no-kissing/arrests/kiss-in/mea culpa-mea culpa is making my head spin. Even Paris, France has gotten in on the action. And everyone knows the French HATE any emotion other than ambivalence, so this must be catching steam. It was only a matter of time before this new kissing disease went viral.

Enter radical pro-kisser David Badash from "The New Civil Rights Movement."

Saturday, August 15 at 2:00pm David is calling for a national "kiss-in" demonstration to be held all over the country. He's looking to do this grass-roots style--Join-the-Impact type--with a growing viral Internet campaign and local organizing. If you're interested in being a local organizer for the kiss in, email David at his full name, one word, at gmail.

Why a kiss-in? Well, basically because something is wrong if two people can't kiss one another on the cheek in public. This is an attempt to force people back into the closet. Homophobes think we're becoming WAY too comfortable, and are trying to send a message. We must make a bold statement that this is NOT acceptable and send an even stronger message back. Public affection is not a crime. Sure the way that SOME folks do it, its pretty darn distasteful, but its not criminal, and we're talking about quick pecks on the cheek here.

The best way to send the message is to get hundreds of thousands of people across the nation--transgender, bisexual, gay, lesbian and straight--to send a clear message that love is good and that affection is a function of love and it will not be silenced for ANYBODY.

Just don't get TOO WILD when you're smooching on the cheek. We don't want anything dangerous. Just a little love.

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HAPPY HOUR... POSTPONED.

Happy Hour Roundup will be coming late today. Fortunately, there is lots of news to report on! Unfortunately, there will be no time for me to collect it and send it. Expect it between 5pm and 6pm!